• First off... the Wiz. Playing short-handed in round one against Cleveland was definitely a worst-case scenario. They learned absolutely nothing about their ball club and will undoubtedly move forward with the same make-up and strategy that they've had the past few seasons. The run-and-gun/no defense thing just can't work, which leads me to my next bullet...
  
  
• I'm actually pleased the wheels fell off the Warriors and Suns bandwagons last round. Their brand of ball may have made Bo Kimble a lottery pick, but it ain't gonna win championships. Sure it was exciting and oftentimes well-played, but at some point you've got to play some D. Good riddance small-ball!
  
  
• If there were to ever be a sequel to "Eight Men Out", the Spurs game 3 performance against the Jazz could easily be your storyline. I don't know who pulled those strings, but that was a giveaway. Each Tim Duncan foul was like Eddie grooving one in the movie. Jazz fans crying about flops today should just be happy the series wasn't allowed to be over yet.
  
  
• Also: Gilbert breaks down the Blazers and Sam Vincent is once again linked to Michael Jordan

Labels: NBA, WashWiz

Agent Zero's season is over. The Wizards season is over. The Papertown Shakes season might not be far behind.

The most gracefully uncoordinated fool in the NBA crashed into Gilbert Arenas' left knee last night, tearing his miniscus. How clumsy is Gerald Wallace (dubbed "Crash" by some)? He wears shoulderpads, that's how. Now, the world's just as imbalanced as he is, without it's greatest entertainer.

Can the Shakes survive? It's been a tough week:

• Tuesday - F/C Al Jefferson ran into a teammate in practice, injuring his knee
• Tuesday- F/C LaMarcus Aldridge was deemed out indefinitely after getting dizzy on Saturday
• Wednesday - G/F Michael Redd sat out the his teams game purely for tanking purposes
• Wednesday - G Gilbert gets crashed into, torn miniscus

Labels: fantasy basketball, WashWiz

Let last night's bottom two of Stephanie Edwards and Chris Richardson serve as a reminder of who's Idol this is. I get the feeling the creators of this show, known as "Pop Idol" in other countries, knew exactly what they were doing when they made the name change for the United States version. After all, we're a land of cynics, pranksters and racists... and they were putting us in charge of a talent show?

This call-out isn't a direct response to my AI6 pick getting the boot 10 weeks earlier than predicted. I realize Stephanie has steadily regressed since her round of 24 effort and I have since admitted that she might be hard-pressed to last longer than a 7th place finish. Of course had she not been eliminated before several less-impressive contestants, she might have once again found her groove and began to regain the momentum she had lost. But probably not, since it appeared that she was just a bit out of her league.

Rather my disappointment lies in the fact that the combination of Stephanie AND Chris represented the 2 lowest vote-getters this week. For one or the other to slip through the cracks and potentially be sent home early has become a standard of the show... the bottom 3 has its surprises. But to think that the motley crew of Malakar, Stacy, Scarnato, Sligh & Glockson (get your tour tickets now!) were comfortably seated while either standing contestant wasn't even going to crack the top 10 is a farce. Shame on a country.

The good news is the Wizards are in the middle of a west-coast swing and "all that is right with the world" aired on Comcast Sports Net shortly after Idol. The WashWiz/SuperSonics tilt had its ups and downs, its highlights and lulls. But at the contest's close, with less than fractions of time remaining on the game-clock and the scoreboard's dueling focal points harmoniously exact, Agent 0's floating essay embraced Key Arena's northern window and incontrovertibly caromed through the goal for a two point basket. Wizards win. No strings attached.

Labels: AI, Holy Thesaurus, NBA, WashWiz

After our candid logo discussions earlier in the week, I was pleased to come across the artwork above representing the Dakota Wizards of the NBA Development League. Now this is the way to depict a Wizard. The WashWiz would creep opponents right out of the phone booth with this graphic emblazoning center court.

Dakota's eye for design, plus a certain something I've washed my hands clean of that's captivating hoops fans at the moment, has sparked my interest in taking a closer look at the NBA's D-League. I got my first real taste a few weeks ago while watching the D-League All-Star game as part of the NBA's All-Star Weekend. The most familiar name to me was Bakersfield Jam guard Gerry McNamera, but game MVP Pops Mensah-Bonsu has made the most of the occasion having recently been called up by the Dallas Mavericks. Here are a few links to open your eyes to the D.L.:

• The league's created a nice little promotion with Gatorade, calling players acquired by NBA franchises Gatorade Call-Ups. Luke Schenscher's the latest Gatorade Call-Up.
  
  
• Randy Livingston proves the D-League ain't just for rookies.
  
  
• In true minor league tradition, the Arkansas RimRockers are giving away Bill Clinton bobbleheads tomorrow night.
  
  
• While few D-Leaguers have yet to make a major impact in the NBA, there have been a few to latch on and play prominent roles.
  
  
• Looks like tomorrow night's Jam/Flyers tilt will feature more than one Syracuse alum.
  
  
• And don't miss this opportunity to get a tee with a real Wizards logo on it.

Labels: logos, NBA, WashWiz

Choose your favorite from the Steve Buckhantz lexicon: Backbreaker! Dagger! How do you like that?!? They all applied unfavorably to the Washington Wizards this weekend after consecutive buzzer-beating losses. Here are a few observations after a weekend with the Wiz:

• Add Steve Francis (remember him?) and Udonis Haslem to the long list of players to unexpectedly torch the Wizards. It's been happening all year from the likes of Ryan Gomes, Zaza Pachulia, Devin Brown, so on and so on.
  
  
• Not to beat up Fast Eddie Jordan, but two coaching decisions played a big role in last night's loss. First, Jordan decided not to foul Shaq within the final 3 minutes of a close game, rather opted to double-team him and allow Shaq to use his passing skills, finding teammates for easy buckets. Pat Riley's play-call with 3 seconds to go was great. He drafted a play for the player facing Washington's worst defender rather than automatically going with one of Miami's top offensive players.
  
  
• The Wizards are great entertainment. Everytime I think I've got a clear thought about them, the opposite happens. Plus, darned near all of their games go down to the wire.
  
  
• Gilbert Arenas has to be the most clutch offensive player in the game today. Prior to Haslem's heroics last night, "Keep Shootin'" canned all 3 of his free throws with 3 seconds left to tie up the game. He also hit a running 3 at the halftime buzzer. Agent Icewater!
  
  
• The Wizards still aren't a complete enough team to be taken too seriously, and a lot of that goes back to the drafting board. Watching Jared Jeffries suddenly become an aggressive force against the Wiz on Saturday got me to thinking of how the Wizards haven't drafted a player to have a significant impact on the team since Juwan Howard was drafted in '94. The few "names" they've drafted in the last 15 years such as Richard Hamilton and Rasheed Wallace were traded away for veterans before an impact was made. Others that could fill roles such as Devin Harris, Jared Jeffries and Kwame Brown weren't kept around long enough to develop. The point is this - elite teams build through the draft (save for the '04 Pistons).
  
  
• Looking at that draft list, Washington does clean up on drafting future NBA coaching legends. Doug Moe, Don Nelson and Larry Brown and Jerry Sloan were all selected in their first 4 drafts.
  
  
• Quite frankly, we've got the worst logo in all of sport.

Labels: NBA, WashWiz

Gilbert Arenas celebrated MLK-day with another game-winning, buzzer-beating three-pointer. It's not too late to join the fan club. Membership includes, but is by no means limited to:

• Agent Zero tees in all shapes and colors
• Get a 16" by 20" photo of Gil's most clutch jumper
• Earn your degree in Gilbertology
• Fire up a Hibachi BBQ Grill
• Learn to create your own Gilbert Arenas ice sculpture

Labels: NBA, WashWiz

If you’ve been reading the countless features on Gilbert Arenas this preseason, you might have heard that the Wizards new marketing pitch is “Go All In.” I propose to you, Wash Wiz brass, that you “Go All Out” for a change.

Another offseason has passed without the Wizards making any fan-base energizing roster adjustments. I was critical of last season’s offseason, claiming the Kwame Brown/Caron Butler trade dealt away the Wizards only promise of establishing an inside presence and wouldn’t make them a better team. Maybe Butler was slightly better than a dime-a-dozen 15-5-3 guy, but the Wiz dropped from 45 wins to 42 wins, from a 5 seed to a 6 seed, and a 1st round playoff exit. Granted, the Larry Hughes departure had more to do with that than the loss of Brown, but the team’s makeup sorely lacked the tough defensive rebounder and back-to-the-basket scorer that Kwame could very well have become.

Prior to this preseason, Washington’s free agent additions have been: DeShawn Stevenson, a starting guard; Darius Songaila, a key reserve forward; and Calvin Booth, a 3^rd-string center. Without any rookie additions competing to crack the top 10, the Wizards are counting on these players to help them remain a +.500 team. That’s difficult to get excited about.

But I’ll try…

Shooting guard Stevenson is a 6-year NBA vet at age 25. In his 2 seasons as a starter, he averaged about 11 ppg, similar to the numbers reserve SG Antonio Daniels gave the Wizards last season. DeShawn Stevenson gives you more rebounds but fewer assists than Daniels. There are 2 key differences between them that may indicate an upgrade to the Wizards lineup: 1) Stevenson shot 46% from the floor last season (not bad these days) and took only 15 3-point shots, which tells me he can effectively drive the lane and get to the rim despite his 6-5 frame; 2) Stevenson is a physical defender rather that can make up for the loss of the only thing current Knick Jared Jeffries brought to the team last season.

4^th year pro Darius Songaila is a 6-8 power forward and may challenge for that starting position in Washington despite only having started 7 games in his career. A career 50% shooter, he had a deadly spot-up shot that can pull his defender away from the basket. There are mixed reviews on his defensive and rebounding prowess, which may explain why teams haven’t been willing to allow him to crack their starting 5.

These acquisitions, combined with the return from injury of Jarvis Hayes and the possible insertion of Etan Thomas into the starting center slot, have convinced Gilbert Arenas that the Wiz will be better. Are you willing to “Go All In”?

Notes:

• New alternate home jersey
• Wizards TV Schedule
  

Southeast Division Forecast (or Recast in this case)

1. Miami Heat
2. Washington Wizards
3. Orlando Magic
   
4. Charlotte Bobcats
5. Atlanta Hawks
   

Labels: NBA, rank and file, WashWiz

The 75 or so fans who attended Hornets games in New Orleans better get used to the team playing in Oklahoma City. I watched for the first time a Hornets home game played in Oklahoma City and was very impressed with the crowd's enthusiasm during their tilt with the Wizards last night. The building was alive with fan noise throughout the game, including both when the Chris Paul-less Hornets were losing by 20+ and when the David West-led Hornets sank a buzzer-beater with no time left on the clock to pull out a one-point victory. OK City is an NBA hoops-haven, who knew?

As a Wizards fan, the greater issue is my mounting, albeit uncomfortable, distaste for PF Antawn Jamison. Uncomfortable because by all accounts Jamison is an outstanding NBA player: a team player; highly skilled offensively; young and energetic. When he's on, his offensive game is a treat to watch. Jamison can hit the three, can score in close from the post or off the offensive glass, and will release shots from unorthodox angles that make his defenders look foolish.

Unfortunately, Antawn Jamison's defense is terrible. I don't think its because he is lazy or apathetic towards putting in the effort on the defensive end. I just think he's bad at it. He doesn't have a feel for it. And I think this glitch is the main reason the Wizards are destined to be a 5th to 8th seed in the Eastern Conference, without much hope for improvement in the foreseeable future.

Do they trade Jamison straight up for a more defensively capable power forward? Do they try playing Jamison at the small forward position and bring in a legit power forward via free agency or the draft? Or do they remain satisfied, so enamored with his offensive repertoire that they continue spinning their wheels as a good but not great team?

Last night's game epitomized what Jamison brings to this Wizards team. With Washington down by one point and less than 4 seconds remaining on the game-clock, Jamison picked up a loose ball in the corner, calmly raised and sank a jumper to give his team the lead with 0.5 seconds left. As the Hornets lined up for the ensuing inbounds play, the defensive liability Jamison watched from the sidelines. The Hornets starting power forward, David West, came open at the top of the key thanks to a P.J. Brown screen, and became the unlikely hero by sinking a 20 footer at the buzzer.

Labels: NBA, WashWiz

December 19th: MNF stands for Monday Night Favre as the gunslinger's 3 win Packers square off against the 4 win Ravens. So thrilling that I actually watched a series or two, which was enough action to see Favre throw a few hail-mary's. It's amazing that he actually used to be pretty good.

December 21st: Gilbert Arenas scores 36 points on 14 of 27 shooting to lead the Wiz past the Nuggets. The Wizards are currently the 8th ranked team in the Eastern Conference and are not quite playing as well as they played last season. Big reason? 27 shots is not enough for Gil Arenas... keep shootin' Gilbert!

December 22nd: From the mouth of the Ultrasound technician... "If you promise not to paint your room pink, it looks like a 70/30 chance it's a girl." Fair enough. A gray room it is.

December 23rd: Nice! An early Christmas gift! The Papertown Fribble acquired Tracy McGrady and Joel Pryzbilla from Upper Echelon for Baron Davis and Emeka Okafor. I know, it sounds like Echelon got the gift, but the Fribble needed a shake-up!

December 24th: Good to see the George W. Bush Christmas photo was replaced by Olivia's Happy Hannukah craft at the Miller's.


December 25th: Christmas morning with MJ... good times. And how about that iHome? An alarm clock with a sleep mode that plays music from an iPod means no more John Tesh Radio Show!

December 26th: Team Jacoby/Snyder thrive down the stretch of "Think A Little During Christmas" and edge Team Dietrich/Kayla by 1 point. Clutch work on the Singers and Songs Jumble.

December 27th: The return of junkmail... it is amazing to me that I still only get 12 CD's for the price of one. In 1989, I got 8 tapes for the price of one. Considering the boom in digital music over the last 3 years or so, I would have bet the penny that you tape to the reply card that you could get at least 25 CD's for the price of one by now.

December 28th: On her way home from work, just as she's about to turn into the driveway, my wife decides to shine her high-beams in the direction of an oncoming police car. The officer figures he'd investigate and gets out of his car as my wife stops in the driveway. A brief exchange of "can I help you with anything ma'am" followed by "I'm sorry, I meant to turn on my turn signal" and the policeman left. The problem? MJ was driving with a headlight out. The cop either didn't notice or thought it was no big deal. Nice work, Ace.

Labels: fantasy basketball, holidays, Mallory, nfl, WashWiz